Unexpected Quarters
by Pegasus
Summary: Re-named and complete (last sent up as 'Redemption'). Natural successor to earlier fic 'Teamwork'. Help can come from many angles...some of them rather unexpected.


DISCLAIMER: Most of the characters in the story belong to Squaresoft. No infringement intended, blah,blah,blah. Please, please, please do not reproduce this story in part or in whole anywhere without at least asking me first! Thank you...

**Unexpected Quarters**

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_When things get a little too much, help can come from highly unexpected angles..._

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_NB: This story is a natural sequel to my earlier fic, 'Teamwork' which can be read [here][1]. It probably helps to have some understanding of who Irvine is blathering on about, but, as Squall would say...whatever._

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All I have to do is jump. 

He approached the rail around the roof of the Garden and, steeling himself, looked out over it. It was a longer way down than he had anticipated. He gazed out over the rail, the symbolic barrier between his life of misery and…well, whatever happened next. 

All I have to do is jump. 

He stepped forward and took a second look down. The lights of Garden blurred in his tears and looked beautifully surreal. What was he waiting for? 

All I have to do is jump. 

Easy enough and I can't even do that. 

Jump, already. Or fall off backwards, then you won't have to watch the ground coming up to meet you. 

All I have to do is jump. 

Taking several deep breaths, he finally managed to clear the barrier that stood between him and sweet oblivion. Climbing over the rail, he turned to look upon Garden for one last time. As he let go of the rail, his first thought was "I've changed my mind," which was immediately cut short by the sudden shock of someone grabbing his forearm and hauling him back up again. Which hurt. Jarred out of his personal reverie, he slumped to the ground, breathing heavily. 

"You'd make one hell of a mess, Kinneas. You so selfish that you didn't stop to think about the poor guys who'd have to clean your intestines away?"

Irvine said nothing as he lay face down, trying to decide whether he was happy or not about having been thwarted.

"I thought for a minute you were gonna wimp out. You don't disappoint, do you. Kinneas? Put on a hell of a show for me. 

The voice finally began to filter into Irvine's head and he lifted his face up. "Seifer?"

"The very same." Seifer stepped forward into the light. He glanced at Irvine, taking in the sniper's three-day growth of stubble, the bloodshot eyes and the disheveled clothing. Wrinkling his nose slightly, he pulled a hipflask from his coat and took a long draw on whatever was inside. 

"So what was that little performance all about, anyway?" 

"Seifer, what are you doing here?" Irvine sat up and stared at the other man. He was uncertain as to how he should react to Seifer's presence. All thoughts of suicide had fled from his confused head as he gazed in disbelief at Seifer. 

The blond head bobbed in mock greeting. "And I'd like to say what a pleasure it is to see you looking so well, but that would be a complete lie, I think." The sound of a match striking was followed by the glow on the end of the cigarette that Seifer lit. He offered the packet across to Irvine who shook his head. "No thanks," he said. 

Seifer laughed, a short bark that made Irvine cringe. "What's up, Kinneas? Scared of killing yourself through smoking now too? You SeeDs. You're such wimps." 

"Did you want something, Seifer?" Irvine finally got to his feet and scowled at him. "Or have you just come to irritate the hell out me?" 

"Zell was right about you. You're a loser. Look at you! You've got no kind of self-respect at all, have you? Go on, jump. I don't even know why I bothered to stop you. I notice none of your other little friends are here to stop you. What's up, Kinneas? They seen you for who you really are?" 

Irvine bristled. "They're on a mission. I…I didn't go with them." He turned away from Seifer. The older man nodded.

"So they've cut you out of their precious little circle too, huh?" He sat down again and offered the hipflask up to the sniper. Irvine hesitated, then figured he had nothing left to lose and sat down next to Seifer, taking the flask. Together, they stared out into the blackness of the Balamb night. 

After a few moments of silence Irvine sighed. "I cut myself out," he said, softly. "I see that now. But hindsight is 20/20, isn't it?" 

Seifer raised an eyebrow. "Philosophy, Kinneas? Unexpected coming from you. I thought life was all about notching up another girl's name on that bedpost of yours." 

"That's stopped now." Irvine's tongue had been set free by the alcohol and he didn't care who he talked to. "I have someone…special. No, she's not special, she's the best." 

"Oh, I can see that," Seifer said, mockingly. "She's so good that you're willing to plummet to your death to prove your undying love for her. Impressive, I must say." 

"I would die for her," Irvine fired back at Seifer instantly. "I know that. But…because of me, she nearly died in a training exercise six months ago." 

"Nearly? So she's fine. What's the problem?" 

Desperate for the need to talk, heedless of the fact that he didn't trust Seifer further than he could comfortably spit him, Irvine began to talk about the events that had lead up to him standing on the verge of taking away the pain and heartache that had torn the young sniper apart. 

Irvine glanced across at Seifer. He was sprawled out on the Garden Roof, his cigarette in his mouth, his hands behind his head. Irvine pulled his knees up to his chest and began speaking. 

"We were fine for the first few months. Jani recovered very well from her injuries and we spent time together just being grateful we could. We went out on simple missions at first - I think Cid felt guilty for what he'd put us through.

"I used to love watching her fight. She was full of grace and elan. Her arrogant stance…her fluid movements…beautiful. I watched a lot of girls, in my time, Seifer, believe me. But none of them were ever quite as fascinating as her. Our relationship was perfect. She loved me and I loved her. Damn it, I still do love her. Sometimes, we would just sit and hold each other and I knew more peace and joy than I could ever have hoped for. "

"So what's the problem, Kinneas? Sounds to me like you've got everything you could want to live for." Seifer blew an idle smoke ring.

Irvine sighed, angry at having been interrupted in mid flow, but answered Seifer's question. "The problem? The problem is me. I've lost it, Seifer. I've lost my ability to deal with high tension situations. And that ain't the right way for a sniper to do his job properly now, is it?" 

Seifer said nothing, but lay back on his hands, staring up at the night sky as Irvine composed himself a little and continued. "It started in a crazy kind of a way. We were out on a sniper mission…and at the critical moment, I just couldn't do it."

Irvine's head dropped into his hands. "All I could think about was missing and failing. Headmaster Martine always said that failure was not an option and suddenly here I was…ready to fail. Jani managed to steady me a little and I took the shot. But I missed. Just like…with….Edea." 

Seifer shrugged. "It happens. Get over it." 

"It doesn't happen to ME. I never miss." Irvine's face was morose. 

"Cocky little bastard, aren't you, Kinneas?" Seifer sat up again. "Haven't you ever considered the fact that from time to time people make mistakes? Get things wrong? Don't manage to carry a job through the end, I mean, Gods! What do you want out of life? 24/7 perfection? Because it ain't never gonna happen. You understand?" 

There was an uncomfortable silence.

"So you were gonna haul yourself off this roof and create a stain on the scenery because you missed one lousy shot?" 

"No. Because…I can't handle how I feel." 

* * * 

Irvine and Jani had come back from that mission with him close to tears. She had tried desperately to reassure him, much as Seifer was doing now, but Irvine had had it drilled into him about failure being the ultimate disappointment. When they got back to Balamb Town, he had refused to go back to Garden, saying he needed time to think, to evaluate what had happened. Reluctantly, Jani had gone back to Garden alone. 

When Irvine hadn't come back that evening, Squall and Zell had headed down to Balamb Town to find him. And find him they did, sitting on the dockside, a bottle in his hand, drunk as a lord. They had forcibly wrested the bottle from his grasp and dragged him, protesting, back to Garden. 

The following morning, he had been entirely apologetic and his friends had been supportive, understanding, if a little baffled. Jani had hugged him fiercely and told him that it didn't matter if he suddenly forgot how to even load his rifle, she would love him no matter what. 

* * *

"So they forgave you?" Seifer barked a short laugh. "For the love of…" 

"You want to hear this story or not?" 

Seifer waved his hand nonchalantly. "Sure, sure." 

* * * 

That night had just been the start of Irvine's slide into depression. Whenever he looked in the mirror, he could swear he saw the word 'failure' emblazoned across his forehead. For the sake of his friends and for them alone, he had tried to cover up how he felt, but they weren't stupid. It was evident that the sniper was suffering in silence.

It started in quiet, subtle ways. Irvine would turn up late for morning training sessions, disheveled, unshaven and looking distinctly hungover. He changed from being pleasant and charming to being boorish and bad-tempered. Then had come the day when he had quite simply stayed in his room and refused to come out. 

Jani had been the first to suffer at his hands. She had come to him, pleading with him to let it go, to not let it destroy his life, or their relationship, and he had yelled her out of the room, blaming her entirely for his current state. 

* * * 

Seifer winced. "Bad move, my friend." 

A hollow laugh. "You can't begin to imagine how it made me feel, seeing the look of hurt and rejection that came into her eyes. But those words…once I said them, there was no unsaying them."

Irvine took a shuddering breath and was silent for a time until Seifer stubbed his cigarette out and sat back up. "And that's why you were gonna do the big splat? No, there's more, isn't there?" the expression on Irvine's face told him he was right. "Well, let's have it then."

The sniper narrowed his eyes, but Seifer seemed honestly intent on the story, there was no hint of sarcasm or superiority in his face. Hell, why not tell someone? He was already starting to feel better.

* * * 

Jani had, being a woman, naturally, not let it rest. Time after time she came to his room, begging him to come out. It didn't matter about what he had said, she would say, it didn't matter. They could work through this. Time after time Irvine ignored her, laying on his bunk with his head turned to the wall. 

Eventually, Jani's patience had worn out and she had given up on him. Her heart broken, full of guilt for what she now perceived as her fault, she had left Irvine's room and gone to Quistis. Explaining through her tears what Irvine had said to her had left the former Instructor fuming. She had stormed into Irvine's room to tell him exactly what she had thought of him. 

* * * 

"She's so bossy," agreed Seifer. "She always was."

Irvine managed a smile. "D'you know, I think I WILL bum a smoke from you." Seifer grinned and flipped a cigarette over to Irvine and, as he leaned forward to light it urged the sniper to finish his story. "And what did you say to Quistis?" 

"Heh." Irvine took a long draw on the cigarette, choking slightly. "I told her exactly that. I said that she should keep her interfering, busy-body self out of my business." 

Seifer, uncharacteristically, giggled. "I bet that went down well." 

"Like a lead balloon," agreed Irvine. "By Ifrit, that woman can shout." 

* * * 

One after the other, Irvine's friends had tried. Quistis was too bossy, Selphie too happy, Zell…too Zell. The list went on and on and as the days began to wear into weeks, the sniper's friends finally realized that they had a serious problem on their hands.

It had been round about then that Irvine had finally emerged from his room, to request a meeting with Headmaster Cid. He had come out of the Headmaster's office, his eyes furious, and stormed down the corridors back to his room. Slamming the door shut he had gone back into isolation. 

Squall had been summoned soon after. 

* * * 

"I don't know what went on in there," Irvine said. "But Squall came to me earlier tonight and said that Headmaster Cid had selected our team for a mission. I laughed in his face." Irvine sighed. "I told him that they'd be much better off without me. He tried to convince me that I was worth something." 

"Squall's not exactly Mr People Person," said Seifer. "What did you go to see Cid about?" 

"Quitting." Irvine sighed again. "He said he couldn't allow me to make such a crucial decision in my current state and that I should go away and think long and hard about what I was doing to myself." 

"Words of wisdom from the Tank Top," nodded Seifer, taking another swig from the hipflask.

Irvine smiled again, this time with genuine feeling. "They went anyway…without me. And once they had left Garden…well…that was when I started to feel the pressure was too much. I came up here…and that's why I was going to jump." 

"Was?" Seifer rolled over and stared at Irvine intently. "Past tense, Kinneas. WAS going to jump…not ARE?" 

"I never talked about this with anyone," replied the young sharpshooter. "I didn't think anyone would like…understand." 

The silence extended into what seemed like hours before the sniper got to his feet. "I'll catch you later, Almasy. I gotta mission to go on."

Irvine was gone.

* * *

"It worked?" Squall's voice was full of relief. "He opened up to you?" 

"Like a fish under the filleting knife, Squall." Seifer grinned at his one-time rival's image on the telescreen. "Nonchalance and indifference know one another too well for it not to have worked. No, your precious Galbadian won't be contemplating that way out of Garden for some time, if at all. He's on his way." 

"Thanks, man," said Squall, gratefully.

"Hey, no problem, right?" Seifer grinned his cocky grin and flicked off the communicator. Lighting up another cigarette, he leaned out over the rail of Balamb Garden and watched intently as a figure in a long coat and hat ran almost boyishly out of the gates with a loud whoop. 

Smirking in satisfaction at a job well done, Seifer got back down into his comfortable position, his hands behind his head, looking up at the stars. It had been Cid's idea, of course. But the Headmaster wouldn't…couldn't have known just how much Irvine and Seifer had in common. 

Seifer's memories flashed back to the time when he had leaned over the rail, much as Irvine had tonight…and he grinned as he recalled the help for him that had come from an unexpected source. 

"Guess this makes us quits, Leonhart," he said, to no-one in particular, watching another smoke ring rise into the air. 

**(c) S Watkins, 2000**

   [1]: http://www.fanfiction.net/master.cfm?action=story-read&storyid=31366



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